Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
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