the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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