Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize