im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
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