I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You couldn't find your shoe so you introduced yourself as Cinderella for the rest of the night.
Ahh that explains the text from creepy mike saying he would be my prince charming.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize