batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to rekindle our bromance
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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