So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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