Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
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