Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
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