I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I swear to God, if you have sex in my bed one more time you're gonna start paying rent
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
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