I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize