A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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