I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
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