Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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