the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
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