i don't like sucking hair
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
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