Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize