Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then my best friend's brother, boyfriend, and future bro in law showed up at the bar. they asked who i was there with. didn't know if "a 40 year old man" or "my 5th grade teacher" was better answer.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Less talking, more tequila
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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