She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
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He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
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Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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