wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have aggressive nipples.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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