He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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