Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
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