Well apparently he's into motor boating.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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