youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He uses pillows to masturbate.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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