Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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