This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
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