What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize