To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize