we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
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No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
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Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
dude. I can hear the air.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
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