Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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