Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
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She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
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we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
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