I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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