Tell her she can't have a vagina
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize