eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
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Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
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You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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