he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
operation harelip BJ is a go
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
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