You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I could fuck to npr.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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