She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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