I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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