The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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