Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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