dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
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