My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
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Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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