just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Randomize