i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize