Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Are my feet made of real feet?
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
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