I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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