got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
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She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
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You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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