we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
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