You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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