I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
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